--Of course...you understand that by spanking we don't mean 'beating the crap out of your 16-month-old child ...right?-- When I was younger, I got a smack or a tap...I dunno how things work in your world...but in mine, if a child or anyone, gets spanked or hit...they're most likely not going to do it again...The yelling thing? Doesn't work-- at some point, you learn to block it out..and you continue doing whatever it is that you were doing. It's not as if you're getting into a fight with your significant other and then beating your child...your child did something wrong... I beg to differ. Children push buttons, they test limits...if they do something once and you don't say anything...they do it again to see your reaction a second time...it continues this way until eventually you cannot tell them not to do the action...because, they've done it so many times without repercussions. And being exposed to a balanced household, school life and diet has nothing to do with how you behave? [...]
But just because children push limits, doesn't mean that the punishment has to be spanking. Instead of spanking, why not explain to the child why what he did was wrong and take away a privilege, or put them in time out for a little while? Plus, spanking makes the child afraid of the parent for a while, and then it doesn't work anymore. When they know all they're going to get is a slap or two, why would they stop doing what they're doing? Pain goes away rather quickly, but lost privileges that have to be earned back makes more of a lasting impact, don't you think? The only thing spanking teaches is how to be abusive. There is no good reason for hitting a child, or anyone for that matter. Why would you want to inflict pain on your offspring, even if it just "stings?" I just don't get how warped people's ideas of raising kids are.
I think all of this really just depends on the environment, and I suppose it IS different for every child. My parents never really "spanked" me...but there were only a couple of times when my mom hit me--and I knew to stop whatever it was that I was doing. After that, all I needed was "the eye" and that would be enough. Americans have an interesting view of how to raise their kids, I've noticed...In most other countries, mainly Caribbean countries, there is no question of disciplinary matters concerning parents and their children.
ya if u spank them they have a less chance of acting up again. spanking hurts! lol this is kinda a sterange topic :lol:
I learn better if I am hurt when I do something wrong, as well as most animals, that's why they have electric collars and fences, you hit it a few times and get the idea, oh, the fence we aren't supposed to go past, or if an animal wears a collar, it learns when it feels the shock when it does something wrong. You learn if you burn yourself on the grill when you're 3 years old cause you didn't listen to your parents, or you burn yourself on a candle cause you didn't think your mom was being serious that it's hot... I was spanked as a child, and I think it gets the idea across, the child hates the pain and therefore won't do it again, or as much. It personally pisses me off when parents just yell at their kid or sit them down in a stupid cart carrier rather than actually inflicting minor pain on them.. they don't learn at all when you yell and scream, it just makes them worse and usually louder...
I see your point. But I think self inflicting pain because of ignorance (a kid touching a hot stove) is different than a parent spanking their kid. I think a lot of parents spank their kids because THEY are annoyed by what their kid is doing. The basic lesson is to teach your kid not to annoy you. Parents spanking their kids because they keep standing in the view of the TV is not a life lesson. It's a "Don't stand in front of the TV because that annoys ME" type of lesson. I'm more so against parents spanking their kids for their personal reasons because life lessons are taught in so many different ways. You do something wrong, you're more than likely going to punish yourself for it. As a kid, you don't know what life has in store so you may be annoying as crap now and do a lot of stupid things, but as a teenager going into highschool, you do embarassing things, you experience heart break, puberty, friends/enemies, bad teachers, good teachers, and all that so it's yourself and your experiences that mold you. Not your parents hitting you. I dunno.. Some kids though..
Interesting, interesting. So now-- what type of spanking were we discussing? Because...I'm definitely against 'spanking your child if he/she is in front of the TV' BUT, I'm for the 'spanking your child for watching TV two inches away from it, after you repeatedly told him/her not to'. I've never really heard/experienced any cases where parents spank their kids for doing things that annoy them though ?
With that specific example, why would a parent tell their kid to not watch tv that close? Secondly, the parent is more annoyed the kid didn't listen rather than the kid being "damaged" by watching the tv that closely.. So again, they would be spanking because they are annoyed.. http://ask.yahoo.com/20021230.html A little thing on sitting to close to the tv.. I dunno.. I know parents get annoyed really easily, and that's understandable, but there are other means for punishment.
Sorry - Just using a random example. Well, it really isn't good for you to sit that close to the television. I read an article similar to that one for research...while it may not exactly damage the eyes of an adult...but as children's eyes are still developing it really does have an adverse effect on the eyes of the child. Just the same as when the optometrist tells you not to read books up too close, instead of wearing your glasses...because it strains your eyes and affects your vision. (Heh xD...that was me at age ...4 or so...reading under the sheets with a flashlight)
i definitely agree with spanking. We have become way too soft and politically correct....its painful to watch....a mere opinion that might hurt someone else's feelings can get you in trouble....WTF?
lol very impressive I refuse to think that a child would continue to sit in front of the tv that close if their eyes started to bother them, anyway. Even if they didn't know it was the TV that was doing it.. but that's just me.. But anyway, back on topic.. yeah, I still think there are other means for punishing your kids :arf:
Hmz, i would spank my kids , it would sure teach it. Shame it's illigal in my country though, but even then, i would do it.
Kids these days are getting more and more selfish, spoiled, and bratty. As someone said earlier in this topic, it reflects badly upon the US. I am not saying we should let parents hurt their kids, but my parents spanked me when I was a child and look how I turned out? I am fine, my parents are fine. I don't consider it abuse either, unless the parents are using it as an abusive act instead of punishment, although if parents were allowed to spank it would be hard to tell if they were abusing the child or not.
Wow, may I please use this as an example for not spanking your kids? It will turn them into annoying spammers, only trying to get stuff for free (steal?). Anyone care to try und prove me wrong?
Moderation. That's what I've got to say. Its one thing to spank a child, its another to hit a child. I was both hit and spanked as a child. I was threatened and told children should be seen an not heard. I spent nights without dinner and mornings going without breakfast. I endured teasing and abuse at home. I was afraid to tell my mother if I was ever unhappy, because I knew she would laugh at me. My childhood was anything but pleasant. In elementary school, I once forgot a book that I had to write a project on. I was rewarded with a kick to the back. When I went to school, my friend hit me in the exact spot...that was when the teacher found my big foot shaped bruise in the middle of my back. I never said anything. I claimed it was shaped like that because my big brother and I had been rough housing. This was abuse. It was painful and psychologically damaging. My first reaction still is to flinch when people get angry, and as a result, I only ever think badly of myself. I will never step out of line because I know how quickly my family will turn their backs on me. I believe that spanking is one thing, abuse is something entirely different. I can tell you that I gleefully accepted a spanking over a beating. Its not that that makes me accept spanking though. My story is an extreme case. What makes me okay with spanking is the fact that many children have no respect for their parents anymore. And spanking shouldn't be abuse, if it is properly applied. A kick, a punch, a slap...those things are very different. A child should not be spanked for the slightest thing, but they should also not be rewarded for bad behavior, as many children in the United States are. If a child is in a store and screaming for a toy, many mothers buy the toy to shut the child up. That is wrong. They should quietly be warned that their behavior is unacceptable and have consequences...Does that mean spanking? No. Spanking is something that should happen when the child does something truly wrong, like hurt an animal, another child, ect, on purpose. I am sorry for rambling, but this is rather a touchy subject with me.
You, my friend, should not be allowed to reproduce. First of all, don't you think it's illegal for a reason? All spanking does is teach a child how to be violent, and that when you're angry or don't like what someone else is doing, it's okay to hit. Think about it-- if someone hit you, would you be more or less willing to listen and understand? Less. Why would you think a child is any different? Children deserve parents who will respect them, not parents who feel the need to assert their authority via abuse. It's unfortunate that happened to you, and your parents sound like idiots who don't have a clue about child rearing. But, you must know that there really isn't a difference between hitting and spanking. Both inflict pain on the child and both are cruel. Abuse is abuse, no matter what you call it. And I really don't believe that the solution to disrespectful children is "spanking." Spanking is disrespectful to the child, and it doesn't help teach respectful values at all. Talking to the child like a human being and an equal will have a much greater effect. And why on earth would spanking be a punishment for a child who has been violent? Basically, the 'parent' (and I use that term lightly) is saying, "it's wrong when you hit people, so I'm going to hit you to teach you otherwise." How confusing is that?! And many times, children think something is wrong with them rather than their behavior, which can lead to serious psychological problems. Spanking is never, ever a solution.
I BEG to differ with you there ang. There is a huge, huge, difference between spanking..and say- throwing your child down the stairs or you know beating him/her with a switch or anything ridiculous like that . I think whether or not spanking reinforces respectful values is subjective..some think it does and others don't think so. I'm not sure if you understand what your definition of spanking is..but for me it isn't anything harsh--kids often need more of a definitive deterrent than a "Johnny- I'm counting to three" sort of thing...I'm not saying spanking is always the solution, because there are times when it isn't necessary- but at the same time I don't think it should be written off entirely. I personally don't see anything wrong with a couple slaps on the wrist or on the tush if in the end it leads to a child who knows right from wrong...