Marry me? , rejected once twice shy?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by Elhoof, Aug 17, 2009.

?

If your proposal was rejected would you ask again?

  1. No way once and only once

    6 vote(s)
    42.9%
  2. I'd try one more time

    8 vote(s)
    57.1%
  3. 3+ Glutton for punishment :P

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  1. Elhoof

    Elhoof Level III

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    Wonder if I'll confuse or fluster anyone with the the topic title teehee :kiss:

    Anyway, I was on the train today and I overheard a conversation where a couple were discussing people who had proposed more than once to the same person (ie. had been rejected one or more times). Got me wondering what I would do if I proposed to someone and they rejected me, would I ask again?

    Personally, I would think its a bit of a deal breaker if someone rejected my proposal I would think it would be a breakup. I have heard of many happy endings, but honestly how awkward would it be to ask again? Also what should happen with the relationship? Any personal experiences of happily ever after? How many times is too many?
     
  2. Similius

    Similius Level II

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    Depends on your own personality and that of your partner. Me, i'm more like you I guess. You should watch the movie "Walk the line", you'll like it lol :D
     
  3. draze

    draze Level II

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    Yeah, if you are declined when you first ask someone... I think there are bigger issues than "i'm not ready yet". A proposal isn't permanent, an engagement isn't permanent, but to me a marriage is forever... If someone WANTS to marry me after I proposed, but isn't ready yet. We can make a longer proposal, but it is a "status", if you will, saying that those two people are taken. It is a commitment, but not a unifying one... If down the road before marriage, they decide it just isn't working out, THEN you can say no. Argh, got of topic... If someone were to say no to me up front, that would be it for me.
     
  4. eloisesa

    eloisesa Level II

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    i think it would be a bit of a deal breaker but then it depends on if they had a decent reason like we've olny been ltogether 2 weeks :lol: or i'd like to get a house first
     
  5. PrinceErik

    PrinceErik Level IV

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    i agree with you, if she said no to my proposal, it would seem like a break-up. i would assume that if she didnt want to marry me now, then she wasnt sure if she ever would want to marry me
     
  6. Elhoof

    Elhoof Level III

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    Lol, just had a thought, the way the rejection happens is probably a key issue, imagine if they laugh at you X( hmm I tried to poll but don't think its there will try again now..

    Edit: Done now a poll :)
     
  7. Jane

    Jane Level IV

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    Well, it's probably either a sign that the person isn't serious, ready for marriage, etc. Cause getting engaged is a BIG step in a relationship.
    It'd be a massive blow to a guy though from a male's point of view.
     
  8. CrC

    CrC Level II

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    It would depend on how it went, but i think i would be willing to try 1 more time. I would also try to find out why she rejected my proposal, maybe there is something as simple as... "I want my older sister to get married first." So, it mostly depends on the reason.
     
  9. gh0stn

    gh0stn Newbie

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    Once i get married it will be the last time. thats if I ever get married. it is no decision to be taken lightly.
     
  10. Elhoof

    Elhoof Level III

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    I guess not taking the decision lightly is relevant but you seem to be slightly confused my friend, this is a question regarding whether you would propose to the same person more than once, not marry the same person more than once (though I must admit Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee's relationship is most entertaining)
     
  11. Lily

    Lily Level I

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    Depends on why they said no. Besides, I'd rather be proposed to than propose myself.
     
  12. PrincessLuna

    PrincessLuna Level III

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    I'm with Lily with this one. :)
    It would all depend on the circumstances - if last time, your families were going through a rough patch or something, and he/she didn't want to rush into anything they weren't 100% sure of, then I'd try again.
    If they rejected you last night because you were drunk, I'd try again.
    If they rejected you because they didn't feel it would work, then no.
     
  13. FF9ZidaneGal

    FF9ZidaneGal Level I

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    Even though I am a lady....

    If I was to propose to someone and they rejected me, that's it. There's no point in going on because really...why do we date? Why do we have boyfriends / girlfriends because we're trying to find our soul mate. If we feel we found them but they told us no, why bother dating them anymore? because they obviously don't want you in bed with them for the remainder of their lives. xD

    Anyway...

    One shot, that's all. :p
     
  14. Anfan

    Anfan Level IV

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    I really doubt I'd propose to anyone in the first place, but if you think about it, engagements AREN'T permanent.

    One of my friends is Muslim, and she says that they're not allowed to date; what they're supposed to do instead of "dating" is get engaged for 6 months, figure out if the couple is compatible or not, and then either get married or break the engagement. If you've been dating someone for long enough that you seriously want to propose to them, I'd assume you'd have good reason to and choose a good time (e.g. NOT when they're drunk -.-), and they say no...

    ...quite frankly, to me that seems like the end.
     
  15. Rena

    Rena Level III

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    Well, I doubt I'll propose to anyone, because I'm a stereotypical person. I'm a girl xD

    But, if I were to, yes, I'd try again, although it depends on the reason why the person rejected me in the first place? I think, at the start of a relationship, I would already have brought in ideas of marriage, because I want my first relationship to be with the person I end up marrying. That's why I am very cautious when it comes to these kind of things; I've never been in a relationship before.
     
  16. Istay lowkey

    Istay lowkey Level I

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    Why do you think there so many divorces nowadays, people are so quick to get married because they always feel like
    if the marriage doesn't work which (many times it doesn't) they can easily get out of it with a divorce

    I think marriage itself is a "stupid idea" if you love the person you don't need a few words and documents that say
    you love them.