Excellent, although, I don't quite understand how it would match the ending that was stated in the first post. There are a few small mistakes in the story but overall, good.
LOOOL i totally forgot about that first post.. Yea, i didnt even proof read that up top. (though my grammars pretty crap anyway) I wasnt looking on refining it too much, just something off the top of my head reading a good book just makes you wanna live in that world of fantasy a little longer ----------- WOW i just read through it. it had ALOT OF mistakes. must've killed the flow.
Okay so how many applicants there are? 3? If so, I'll declare this contest unsuccessful and no prizes would be awarded. So hurry up guys.
I dont really care about the prizes, i just wanted to write >=] fastyy, why dont you have a stab at writing?
Gee Fasty, that'd be a little unfair on the people who took the effort to enter right? Here's mine. Inspired by the disappearance of a certain member, but looks like he's back to lurk for a bit. Spoiler Billy was surprised at how light it was. It was some years since he'd lifted something bodily, yet it seemed no heavier than when he first carried his wife over the doorstep nine years ago. His figure had altered quite a bit since he had bought that rowing machine, and no doubt his snazzy lamborghini was what drew that boy's attention to him. Yet it was still surprising that boys so readily took candy from strangers. Billy placed the unconscious body in the cellar, and bolt locked the door. He looked at the ID he took from the boy. It said "Joey Z". He grunted, thinking that kids took themselves too seriously these days. The doorbell rang. A continuous, insistent ring. Angrily he threw the wallet under the counter, then, glancing at the untidiness of the room, went to see who the unexpected caller was. "Oh, it's you." His tone was gruff, almost aggressive, and the door remained barely open to the caller. "Can I come in?" The young man's tone was polite but insistent. "I know I'm early, but I must talk to you, Billy. It's important." "What the hell do you --" began Billy, but before he could finish the door was barged open. "Don't be an idiot Billy! Why are you throwing a divorce barbeque? And where the blazes are you going to get real meat? Like it says in the invitation?" "Meat is indeed rarer than gold these days ever since that flesh eating bacteria pandemic." Billy said, "Wiped out 99% of the world's fauna, and the rest are 'protected'. Huh!" For a moment there was a look of restrained defiance in Billy's eyes, then slowly he stepped aside and let the unexpected visitor in. The two men faced each other, uncertain about the next move. Mike said "'I guess she told you about us? Is that why you're holding it? To flaunt your wealth in our faces? Phee told me she got every single penny off of the divorce. So where and how on earth are you going to get the meat? Did you have something stashed away?" He waited for some response. None came. "Look, I'm sorry it happened. It was a lousy thing to do, especially to someone who works with me. But these things happen." "Yes," answered Billy. "They always said you were quite the Don Juan." Mike stared at the man, unable to accept the full meaning of his words as Billy continued, "I'm sorry Mike, but that's how it is. After today, we're through. You still owe me. But once you've done this little thing for me, we're through. All ties cut." "What do you want me to do?" asked Mike, whose eyes searched the room looking for some indicator of what the favour was going to be. His eyes lingered on the lock. He could hear a faint banging and sobbing of a kid. Billy seemed to be in a world of his own; far, far away. "You're going to pick up that syringe and cleaver over there." "......who was...is he?" Mike's voice sounded disturbed. "Hell if I know." Billy said thoughtfully, "Some idiot kid with his head in the clouds" "Billy...this is wrong. Just wrong...I mean...what if we get caught?" "We won't. The place was deserted. The newsreporters will just say he was permanently banned. And God knows you owe me this Mike! After all you've done!" "All right, all right. Geez...he won't suffer though will he?" "Not if you use the syringe.... It'll give him a high, make him sleepy" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm totally confused. I thought the man was too nice when he offered me the candy. He had an awesome fierce car. But after the lemon drop....I found myself in this cellar. It's cold, dark, and I'm scared. Am I dead? Is this hell? A feeling of death crossed my spine as I heard voices on the otherside of the door. I tried banging on it, but nothing happened. I don't know what to do. *sobs* I'll just have to wait...until somebody can save me.... And the door was kept shut until the dark man came and opened it. I was scared and the chill of death crossed my spine once again as he came and told me: "Don't be afraid child, you're safe now" and his face became enlightened with pure positive energy. I had a comfortable feeling that I'll be going home soon in one piece. The BBQ was a big success! And Billy woke up and it was a dream. Awwwwww (jk jk)
Wow, Commy, that was interesting. o_o Especially Joey's thoughts at the end, quite the opposite of what was about to happen eh? Excellent read too.
No it isn't. I will take my time and make the poll and vote the winners! prizes are still up! Edited first post!
Alright cool, I hope i'm allowed to submit a different work. If not then . Spoiler Alex sat there, waiting for something he knew he would dislike. Just the air in the room made him queasy. He waited though, it was the least he could do for his old friend. As he was about to get up and grab a drink from the soda machine the doctor walked through the off-white doors. Alex noticed the way he walked, he already knew what the doctor was going to say, and truth be told, he didn’t like it. “The operation was a failure,†Doctor Jay said, “I’m truly sorry but he was already going into cardiac arrest. As well as that, his skull was fractured in several places, it’s as though when he hit the ground his skull pulled itself apart into a puzzle.†“So there’s nothing that can be done?†asked Alex in a lowered voice. Jay looked down at his clipboard, not knowing how to deliver the news. “No, I’m sorry, he’s already dead.†He murmured to Alex. Nodding, Alex accepted the fact that Jay was gone now and nothing would allow him to come back. Blinding lights surrounded him, his heart rate increased as the sound of the audience increased to a deafening roar. He couldn’t focus, the sounds surrounding him were a hassle, but he would have to if he wanted to pull this off. He revved the engine, twice to be exact, and started off into the drop. From the crowd, Alex stood there anticipating what was to happen next. The biker was going down the ramp at a decent speed, still not fast enough to clear the 345 foot tower ahead of him. Maybe he was overanalyzing it though; he could pull it off so long as he stay focus and hits the jump right. As the crowd’s roars reached its peak, the biker hit the edge of the ramp. Soaring into the sky, he knew he could make the jump; perhaps he was overconfident, but he didn’t have a thought in his mind he would fail. Above the tower, at 353 feet, he looked down and saw that his bike was turned to an angle. The first thought was he was going to swerve off the edge of the landing ramp and maybe get injured, but the landing could end with his death. He didn’t have much time to react, well, he didn’t have any. He hit the landing ramp at an angle and swerved off the side. On the downfall, he lost grip to the dirt bike and soon after, hit the ground. His helmet, without a hope to help the fall, blasted into numerous pieces and the biker drifted into an unconscious state. Alex drifted back into consciousness as the doctor waved his hand in front of Alex’s face. Asking if he was alright, the doctor seemed worried. Alex mumbled yes, only thinking about what he had previously been dreaming about. Was he truly thinking of what had happened that night before? Was it the truth, what he saw? Only one thing was sure, and that was that Jay had busted his head on the cement ground after the very jump. Alex, not wanting to accept the truth, turned away and walked out into the fresh air of the morning. The brightest white you could imagine, a seemingly blinding white infact. Jay looked around him and noticed that everything was white, even the chairs and desk in front of him. A man with ghostly white hair sat at the desk, looking at Jay. “Hello Jay,†the man said, “welcome to the waiting room, please take a seat.†“How do you know my name?†Jay inquired. “I know everyone’s name that comes into this room; it’s my job you know.†He replied. Jay nodded then took a seat, he was so confused, and he didn’t even know where he was. Sitting there for what seemed like eternity, Jay took note of what was in the room. To his right was a magnificent portrait of a man whom you could tell had divine powers, and to his left was a portrait of an ugly creature with horns of a bull. Shivering at the sight of the portrait to the left, Jay was asked to come to the desk. As he stood, the blinding white disappeared all around him and a demonic black appeared, surrounding him. There was a door that stood in front of him, a charred door that looked as though it had burned in the deepest pits of hell. He stood there staring at the door, bewildered. And the door was kept shut until the dark man came and opened it. I was scared and the chill of death crossed my spine once again as he came and told me: "Don't be afraid child, you're safe now" and his face became enlightened with pure positive energy. I had a comfortable feeling that I'll be going home soon in one piece. D: 834 words, not too good of a story but really, the only story i've wrote in ages.